Divorce is one of the most stressful and unpleasant experiences that a person can go through. Even when both people are aware of their divorce rights and experience what is termed an agreed divorce, the process can be heart-wrenching. However, it is also a time to grow. Many people use the post-divorce years to “find themselves” and engage in personal growth.
Research shows that the most successful divorced men and women embrace the change to make adjustments within their lives. They may return to school or take advantage of new opportunities at work. Many focus on maintaining existing friendships while expanding the social circle with new friends. Some women report a period of significant personal growth during the initial years following a divorce. They claim to thrive on an increased number of personal choices and greater independence.
Simply feeling positive about the possibility of changing after divorce can pave the way to creating a better life. This creates new relationships and opportunities. Each choice is an opportunity to embrace the possibility of positive change after divorce. One choice leads to another and a pattern is established, placing the individual on the road to an improved life.
It makes sense that people with greater personal resources such as education or income have an easier time adjusting to divorce. Having such resources may offer a greater number of positive opportunities, making change easier to handle. However, it is easy to become consumed by current issues and problems even when these resources are available. Divorced individuals who question their worth or begin sinking into depression immediately following dissolution of the marriage should get help from a qualified professional.
In most situations, at least one spouse does not wish to divorce. This person may have a more difficult time adjusting to the new life and growing on a personal level. Remaining socially involved or forming a new romantic relationship may prevent some distress. For other people, avoiding conflict and finding healthy ways to release negative feelings toward the ex-spouse may prove beneficial.
It is difficult for anyone to determine the personal effect of divorce until the situation arises. A divorce lawyer usually comes in handy for legal issues that develop and a counselor or therapist can provide divorce help that is relatively intangible. Ultimately, each individual determines the path of life following divorce and those who view this as time for personal growth tend to experience pleasant futures.
