Divorce is tough on kids and when both parents aren’t putting in the time to re-build the trust that is lost in kids when divorce happens, big problems can occur. Now, I’m not just talking about when a child doesn’t want to go to dad’s house, this happens to mothers as well. It may not be because of one parent abusing the child or not paying attention to the child. Exploring the reasons why your child doesn’t want to go to your house or your ex’s house is important and needs to be understood. An expert family law attorney will help guide you through this difficult situation, and can get you on the right path with a free consultation.
Working Out Visitation Issues
One of the most common reasons why a kid doesn’t want to go to their other parents house for visitation is they’re leaving all of their stuff behind. Books, games, toys or their ipad may stay at home, and now all they have to do is hang out with mom or dad (which can be boring for a kid!). Couple that with the fact that the child will probably not be having fun and playing with their friends and you’ve got a recipe for one unhappy camper and a child that does not want to participate in visitation.
As the parent who is experiencing the problem of their child not wanting to come over, it’s time to get creative. Think of fun games and activities that your child enjoys and engage them in them. It doesn’t need to cost money, but it needs to be more than sitting around the house talking and watching movies. Riding bikes or having squirt gun wars is fun and is a great way to be playful with your child while keeping them active when they are with you for visitation periods.
If you are the parent with whom your child wants to stay, sometimes you have to just make them go to the other parents house for visitation. Hundreds of studies have shown that a child that grows up without a significant presence of both parents in their lives is detrimental to their growth and overall well-being. Forcing them to go shows them that you respect the other parent and that they should too. Try to be proactive with the other parent, as difficult as that may be post-breakup, and let them know what’s going on and what the child is in to. Realize that this is important, not for you, but for your child, and that is your number one priority.
Raising kids isn’t easy, especially when you break up with the other parent, but it doesn’t need to damage the kids if you do the right thing. Working together for the sake of the kids is important and should be your priority, even after the relationship has ended. Any good divorce lawyer will tell you the same thing. Working out visitation issues isn’t easy, and you should seek the advice of an expert custody attorney who provides free consultations to people in your shoes.